The Sorrows....

I hadn't realized how much hope I had still been holding onto, that one of our soldiers might still be alive.

I hadn't realized how mournful I would feel when I found out they were both gone from this world.

I hadn't realized how angry I would feel when it became clear that one of the soldiers had been dead since the attack itself, and that Hizbullah made it TWO YEARS without ever, ever giving a clue as to the life or death of the soldiers.

For two years, these families, and this entire country, have hoped and prayed for Eldad and Ehud's safe return. We understood the possibility of their deaths, but we hoped and prayed anyway.

I don't understand how the world allows monsters to play by their own rules, catering to their whims, and yet won't "let" us play by the rules G-d gave the world.

The world doesn't make sense.

The soldiers are in a better place. I truly believe they were martyrs for the Jewish people, and they are serving G-d now from a more comfortable existence.

I am relieved for their families, because now they have a final answer... Karnit Goldwasser, Ehud's wife, will have the ability to re-marry if she chooses.

But I am sad... very sad. My heart hurts for their families and for the people of Israel.

And I am proud. Because as angry and sad as I am, I am proud that once again, we have maintained human dignity and not allowed ourselves to sink to the level of the monsters.

Please, G-d, bring us to a place of happy occasions once again.

Sharing the Sorrows with the Joys

A few weeks ago, it hit me how utterly awesome it is that our entire nation shares simchas with each other.

"Simcha" is Hebrew for gladness/happiness, and it's also used to describe happy and joyous events like weddings, baby namings, brits, etc. "Simchas," or "Smachot" ("smay-chot"), would be the plural.

I remember years ago constantly being weirded out when I would say to someone that I was going to a wedding, and I would be told, "Mazal tov!" It wasn't *my* wedding, or my baby... so why were they saying "mazal tov" to me?

Because we, as the Jewish nation, share responsibility for each other. And it's also a commandment to make other people happy at their happy occasions... so the mere fact of being able to attend a wedding is an opportunity to fulfill a commandment. That means it's like a double "mazal tov" for the guest, in a way.

And we do it with genuine joy. Even those events we attend because we feel obligated cause us to feel happiness for the people involved.

It's truly a beautiful thing, then, to understand that wherever we go in this tiny nation, we share our happy occasions, our simchas, with each other.

But there's a flip side to that, as well.

Because it also means that when one person is in pain, we share that. It hurts us when we see other Jews in pain.

Today is the "prisoner" exchange.

As I was watching a cheesy British Biased Corporation (BBC) video of the Hizbullah prisoners being released, I was crying. I was crying for the families of those murdered by the prisoners. I was crying for the families of the kidnapped soldiers. I was also crying for my entire nation, because I am in pain with the belief that this was a no-win situation... but there was a no-win option and a losing option, and I believe we lost.

To use the terms "win" and "lose" seems ridiculous. We're talking about human beings (well, on our side. I have a hard time thinking of someone who dragged a father and his 4-year-old daughter out of their home in the middle of the night, proceeded to shoot the father in front of the girl, and brutally smash the girl's head as a human being), and winning and losing sounds stupid.

This isn't the olympics.

But this is the Middle East. It's a different mentality. The mentality here is hundreds and hundreds of years old. The mentality is that it's important to show your strength in order to deter the other side.

And lucky Israel, we get to be on the losing side of that.

We gave up five LIVE terrorists, along with 199 dead ones, for what appears to be the bodies of two of our kidnapped soldiers and the assorted body parts of 12 more.

Lebanon has declared a national holiday. There will be parades and celebrations for their victory.

We're preparing two funerals.

Kuntar, the vile terrorist, may G-d punish him with all he deserves, will be receiving a State welcome. It's said that Nasrallah might even leave his bunker to welcome him.

I would like to say that at least the families of Ehud Goldwasser and Eldad Regev will finally have the knowledge of what happened to their sons/brothers/husbands/friends. But it's hard to find comfort in that, when it seems that this exchange will only make things worse.

If we're releasing five LIVE terrorists and 200 dead ones for two dead soldiers, what will we have to give up for Gilad Shalit, who we believe to be alive? (May he come home safely soon!)

So it's a hard day for Jewish Israel.

May we only have simchas in the future.

With Whom Could There Possibly Be Peace?

Mom asked me the other day what the general reaction is to the upcoming exchange. I never did clarify with her, but I'm pretty sure she meant the deal in which we, Israel, will bend down and kiss Hezbullah's, Hamas', Syria's and Iran's feet. This would otherwise be known as the prisoner exchange.

Let's review:

Late June, 2006 -- Hamas (at least partially funded by Syria and Iran) attacked in the south and kidnapped Gilad Shalit, an IDF soldier.

Early July, 2006 -- Hezbullah (at least partially funded by Syria and Iran) attacked in the north and kidnapped Ehud Goldwasser and Eldad Regev, IDF soldiers.

Late July, 2006 -- Refusing to concede to the demands of terrorists by exchanging captured and imprisoned terrorists, we went to war in Lebanon. More than 100 IDF soldiers and something like 40 Israeli civilians were killed during this war. (Figures for casualties on the other side are given as approximately 1000, which could be true... but since their media was busted twice during that war for forged pictures and videos, one never knows. But yes, there were probably hundreds of casualties, mostly civilians.)

Again, let's recap in a different way:

They kidnapped our soldiers. They demanded we release terrorists from our prisoners. We refused. We went to war. More people died. We put our tail between our legs and ran home crying. We did not get our soldiers back.

Now, two years later...

We are going to release terrorists from our prisons, in order to get our soldiers back.

We do not even know if Ehud Goldwasser and Eldad Regev are alive.

Makes sense, right?

It's all over the Palestinian media that they're victorious... that they've proven that Israel will surrender to the physical force.

And they're right. 100% right.

2000 - Barak turned tail and ran out of Lebanon without finding a way for us to not look like wusses. The rockets started raining down in the North immediately afterward.

2005 - Sharon's government brutally yanked families out of their homes in Azza, saying that afterward, if the terrorists did anything from Azza, we would use force to stop them. Since then, thousands of rockets have rained down on Israel. Thousands. And we have done nothing.

2006 - They kidnapped our soldiers. We did nothing useful.

2008 - We agreed to a ceasefire in the south. Practically, that means that they're still shooting rockets at our civilians, and we're not responding -- because we're abiding by the terms of the ceasefire, even though they are not.

So is it any surprise that today a Palestinian from eastern Jerusalem went on a rampage with a bulldozer, killing some, injuring tens more, and terrorizing hundreds?

Not to me.

'Cause it only makes sense. They fight... we cower.

I don't usually get all religious here... but when I look at this from a Torah perspective, it just seems clear that our leaders have forsaken Torah in exchange for personal recognition.

G-d gave us this land. He/She/It told us what to do with it... how to conquer it... what would happen to us if we don't maintain our presence here... etc.

And if we would just listen to G-d, and do what we have to do, when we have to do it, He would not only protect us -- He would help us fix the world.

Jerusalem is, according to our tradition, the center of the world. It was here that G-d created Adam and Chava. It was here that Avraham bound Yitzchak on the alter. It was here that G-d's presence dwelt in a tangible form.

And anyone who doubts that Jerusalem is the center of the world need only open a newspaper in just about any major city in the world... because we're there, on a daily basis. Our tiny little scrap of land, with our still tinier city, gets worldwide press almost every single day.

If only we would care about ourselves as much as the rest of the world cares about what happens here...

Meanwhile, however, the other side has no incentive toward peace.

G-d bless the victims of today's attack, and the victims of all the previous attacks.